Frequently Asked Questions

Does “Zen” therapy work?

The field of talk therapy in the United States is vast and evolving, with about 200,000 therapists and over 80,000 psychologists. In this landscape, the predominance of female therapists (approximately 70%) and the general trend towards traditional talk therapy methods don't always align with the unique challenges faced by men in therapy. The age and ethnic demographics of therapists further shape the dynamics of therapy, often necessitating a more tailored approach for diverse client backgrounds.

My path, marked by both traditional and offbeat therapies, underscores the need for a more personalized and adaptive approach to mental health care. This is particularly true for men, who often face societal pressures discouraging emotional openness and vulnerability. The rise of alternatives like life coaching and psychedelic therapy reflects a growing desire for varied and accessible mental health support.

Does talk therapy work?

Nope, I see everyone, but I’ve found that men today need more—they need dedicated therapists who have been out in the world working and doing—and an average forty-one-year-old female isn’t likely to relate to their unique experience in the way an older man, whose been around the block a few times can. Sorry to be blunt.

How come you do longer sessions?

I find that it works better for letting people relax. We can wander off-topic, share our experiences, stretch, and meditate.

You’re Old. Why did you become a therapist?

I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, so I did what came to me. I pursued things that interested me. So, becoming a monk, strategic exec, national security advisor, and professor happened. Ultimately, I realized that my life would be better if shared with others and, more importantly if I could help others.

What did you do in corporate America?

I rocked the boat a lot. I kept my ethics. I got paid to be “innovative”. I got paid to brainstorm ideas and see if they could get done. I caused a lot of trouble. I shook people’s notions of what could work and what would not.

Why did you quit?

The startling low level of ethics people had all in the name of the all-mightly dollar. The bullshit politics. The banality of consumerism. The fakeness that seemed to take over people when they started rolling in money.

Can you relate to trauma?

Yep. I wrote a book based loosely on my childhood. You can find it if you are so inclined. I have had many rough years mixed with the good ones. I lost both my parents during COVID. I’ve been in many relationships. I thrive because I want to.

Who influenced you as a kid?

The women in my family saw a shy, struggling, skinny kid who wasn’t too thrilled about going to football practice so they put me in a “book-a-week” club.

Can you suggest some books?

Tons. Start with Victor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. Then, Bruce Chatwin’s Songlines.

Why is the world such a fucked up place?

In Buddhism, we like to say that delusions are endless. Greed, anger, sadness, violence, stupidity are endless. You can end these things in your own life. You need to want to.

Are you Religious about Buddhism?

No. I don’t go in for organized anything. The essence of Buddhism is to go your own way. That was the essential teaching of the Buddha and Christ, for that matter. Do your own thing. Be kind. Stand up to injustice. You don’t need a guru, method, priest, platform, or broker to get to God- whatever God is. You know what you need to do

I don't know about therapy. Can I talk to you just ONce?

Yes, of course. Schedule a consultation. I offer what would be similar to coaching too.

What do you do for fun?

I go snowshoeing with my dogs, and I cook. I watch a lot of British television. I read a lot. I grew up in our local public library and read anything I could get my hands on. Darwin, Freud, Jung, CS Lewis, Tolkien, Norse and Greek Myth. It’s a habit I have to this day. I also love to listen to music, smoke Cuban cigars, and take baths. Sometimes at the same time.